At the start of week 28, the beginning of the third trimester, I thought I'd do a quick update.

First, the mug shots:

Except for "way bigger" (compare week 28 front and side last time), this is basically how I looked when pregnant with SteelyKid: like I swallowed a series of balls of ever-increasing proportions, and not much different otherwise. Folk wisdom claims this is a sign that I'll have a boy, but, again: basically how I looked when pregnant with SteelyKid.

(Geez, I'm huge. No wonder people at work keep asking me how much longer I'm going to be there, I look more like I did at 38 weeks than 28. However, I must note that this is all second-pregnancy effects, FutureSibling is not unusually large.)

Second, how I'm feeling: basically okay, with some hormonally-amplified anxiety issues.

Fetal growth is as I said normal, lots of fetal movement, no issues with my blood sugar or blood pressure. A little bit of swelling in my hands and feet just recently; one middle-of-night leg cramp. Some increased sensitivity to heat and sun (when I found myself standing in the shade of a traffic sign one morning at the playground, I got myself a big floppy gardening hat). Increased fatigue and abdominal discomfort comes and goes. Stomach is mostly better.

Last pregnancy, I had a thing where I would be sitting quietly thinking about nothing stressful and suddenly feel like I was driving and someone'd just swerved into my lane: a huge jolt of adrenaline, but for no apparent reason. Lots of tests eventually came to the same conclusion I started with: just my endocrine system going wacky. Seems like I have a related thing this time: I don't get the big jolts, but I do get the physical sensations of anxiety and stress, sometimes connected to the emotions and sometimes not. For instance, one time I had a scary thought, dispelled said scary thought in about ten minutes of research, but had the pounding heart etc. for about the next three hours. Other times, the physical sensations don't seem to be connected to anything. But, you know, funky feedback loops, psychosomatic and somatopsychic, chicken-and-egg, blah blah: in light of this, I thought it necessary to deliberately step away from a few things that seemed to be affecting me inordinately. My non-avoidable reactions are manageable, but it is a more conscious and deliberate process than usual and does exact a cost on my time and energy. This seems to have plateaued, but I, Chad, and my doctors are all aware and keeping an eye on things.

Finally, allow me to share with you two actual things said to me today, so that you may know not to say them:

First: "Don't run, you make me nervous!" (Pronouns! Autonomy! Fuck you!)

Second: "So are you excited?" (What would you have done if I said no?)

(With regard to the latter, "Best wishes" is a good safe acknowledgment of someone's pregnancy.)