There's also a complacent thought in Miles's POV (maybe not in Cryoburn) about how "some things were worth doing yourself" re hiring help with the kids.

Me, either. I suspect it's handwaved as "what she was brought up to do", but High Vor entertaining is a skillset all its own, and doing it for *both* Miles's hats is a full-time job. My MIL did the equivalent and raised four kids, but she sure wasn't maintaining a business at the same time.